Who am I?

This is the question that’s always there lingering at the back of our minds. Being honest, we do try to avoid this one as far as we can, but there comes a time when you just can’t carry on this way…

Well, i guess that time came in my life exactly 5 months ago…

It was a usual day (my exams were on then) that started off with breakfast, then studies. There was a certain family feud on in the house since a few days. But that can’t be considered the sole reason that provoked this thought. I guess this is the point where i should let you all know that I was new in this city, in fact, I was new in this country.

I had done my schooling in Saudi Arabia. I guess that should give you the brief idea about my upbringing. No co-ed school, no outdoor activities and no partying with friends. However, I came to India in the 11th standard and joined a Junior College here. Everything was new to me, right from travelling in the crowd, to mingling with girls and even guys. I was also made to join IIT coaching classes alongside my junior college. It was here that I made my first good friend since coming to Mumbai. We were together for the entire 2 years that I was here. With time, we became Best friends. We shared common interests, and also coincidentally had similar nature. Alas, I joined college, while my buddy wanted to give IITJEE another shot. Hence, i continued into my first year of engineering while he went busy with studies. The good part was that we remained in the same city, Mumbai.

That brings me back to that fateful day. What happened now was that, my pal’s parents were posted abroad. However, he stayed back since his exams were fast approaching. Now, that his exams were almost done with, he was leaving to spend the next one month with his parents… That shouldn’t have been a problem, but it was evident from his words that his parents might have some plans for him to continue his studies there. Although, he had promised he won’t do that, who has won against parents wishes…

The mere thought of this was horribly frightening. I had friends in college, now that I had completed one whole year in engineering. Now, the fact was that I wasn’t too involved in the extra-curricular activities in the college. Although, i had secured good grades in the First semester exams, there were several people over-shadowing me. One of them was a guy (referred to as Mr.X) with whom I was friends. The reason for this was that he was good at public speaking, communicating as a whole, while I wasn’t. This is natural, given the place I was bought up in. There were 5 of us in our small group of friends. Slowly, our group was drifting apart. However, the max people were drifting with Mr.X. This was worrying me since it was as good as the 4 of them were pushing me out. So, this was not a good phase of life that I was going through.

All this, and my best friend was also on the verge of leaving. I felt like I was going back to the condition that I was in, during those first few days in Mumbai. All alone, surrounded by strangers.

This provoked me to ask myself,

Who am I?